{"id":250,"date":"2020-03-30T04:37:48","date_gmt":"2020-03-30T04:37:48","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/strongfamily.co.nz\/book\/?p=250"},"modified":"2020-03-30T04:39:56","modified_gmt":"2020-03-30T04:39:56","slug":"establish-values","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/strongfamily.co.nz\/book\/establish-values\/","title":{"rendered":"It is my role to establish values"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Many families are floating like a ship without a rudder because parents have not taken special care to establish values.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You could most probably describe a family you know well and help me to get to know them by telling me what they are like. \u00a0In doing this you are letting me see them through your eyes. What is seen is what a family are known for? This is the best way to describe family values.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At the moment we are all locked away due to the global pandemic we know as COVID-19. \u00a0This means we are not interacting with each other in the same way. \u00a0I\u2019d like to propose that this is a perfect time<\/em><\/strong> to discuss, challenge, dream and redefine what your family is known for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Establishing values is the role of family leaders, and this falls to the parents. \u00a0By establishment I mean making permanent those things that are important. \u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Establishing family values is something the entire family can be a part of.<\/p>PHIL STRONG<\/cite><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

In my first book, Becoming Money Wise<\/a>, I outlined a process to help people define their financial values. \u00a0The reason this is so important is that what we value determines what we do. \u00a0That means, your money follows your heart. \u00a0In this case, I thought it might help you to have some questions that you could discuss around a family table. \u00a0I always find that sharing a meal is a good time to initiate these convo\u2019s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In BMW, the question I pose to readers is \u201cwhat is truly important to us?\u201d \u00a0This question forces you to dig deep, especially if you follow with \u201cwhy is that important to us?\u201d \u00a0Make sure you dig below the surface; shallow answers are not good answers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How to establish values.<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, a good question would be \u201cwhat do you want your family to be known for?\u201d \u00a0This is about the message you send by the way you choose to live.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another good question, which is asked in my book, Building a Strong Family<\/a>, is \u201chow powerful is the imprint you leave on others?\u201d \u00a0For the sake of this exercise, and seeing as you may be starting with a blank page, perhaps this question could be worded as, \u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cwhat positive imprint would we like to leave on the people we meet?\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

This could be answered by thinking about what they would say about you after you\u2019d left their home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“When people can experience what you stand for and who you are, they are willing to take down barriers and open themselves up to you. What a privilege. \u00a0is has allowed me to pour encouragement into people all over the world through our stories. But more than that, my family has been blessed by so many people who have opened their homes and their hearts to us.<\/em>“
(Excerpt from chapter 2, Help your family to be proud of their identity<\/span><\/em>.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Establish values, establish direction.<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

The point of knowing what your values are is to have a clear compass that guides your decisions. \u00a0When you lock in your family values you must publish them (maybe stick them to the fridge) and then choose to look at all decisions you make through the lens of what is important to you. \u00a0By making a decision that compromises your values you are compromising the strength of your family. \u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Whether it\u2019s helpful to note this or not, I\u2019m confident your kids will remind you of what you published on the front of the fridge! Your goal is to use your values to guide your family.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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